Weddings: A Single Perspective

 “The greatest day of one’s life”, a “fairytale event”, “celebration of love”, “holy matrimony”  – these are all phrases used to describe the occasion where two people are joined together for life.  Married to one another in an act symbolic of their love and commitment to one another…FOR-EV-ER.  It’s a beautiful thing really – the way two people can feel so strongly about one another that they feel so compelled to commit to their significant other their life, their love, their entire self- That’s a wedding.  And the party they throw to celebrate their commitment? – That, my friends, is called a reception. (and my favorite part of the entire process…not gonna lie).

Before you roll your eyes and begin to think this is another bitter, grumbling from another single lady angry about her lonely, “table for one” status, let me set a few things straight:

1) I’m neither bitter nor upset (maybe a little envious that my Prince Charming just so happens to be directionally challenged and must have taken a wrong turn (or twelve) on his way to finding me), but certainly not bitter. 

2) I’m actually very happy for my friends who have found the men that fulfill them and treat them as they should!  More power to you, sisters –less competition for me! (Just kidding…but seriously…)  My knight-in-shining-armor will find me when he is supposed to, and then we’ll live happily ever after! So, I’m not worried…

3) I NEVER order a table for one…I’ll just sit at the bar, thank you!

With that said…Attending a wedding as a single lady is a total dichotomy of emotions.  On one hand, you’re so excited for the couple getting hitched – their love for one another is completely obvious, and you feel totally honored to celebrate the momentous occasion with them.  After all – that’s what all little girls dream about!  Plus, you get ideas for your own wedding – am I right, ladies?!  After seeing the bridesmaids hoisting and tugging at their dresses all night long – maybe I won’t do strapless dresses for my bridesmaids? …the table settings? GORGEOUS – how on earth can I afford some just like them? (but not so much like them that people will notice I totally copied her…)…Outdoor wedding-in Texas-in June??  The sweat stains on my silk dress can attest to the atrociousness of that idea…A great band is a must…Just enough adult beverages supplied to allow people to enjoy themselves, but not too much where things get ugly. (Let’s face it—nobody really wants to see their Great Aunt Edna get low to “Apple Bottom Jeans, Boots with the fur” because she had too much of “that juice that tastes so good”!).

On the other hand, attending a wedding as a single lady is a source of trepidation for many of the females out there.  Hours are spent prepping, primping, curling, tweezing, make-up’ing, crash dieting, stressing, and primping some more in order to make sure that they look “just right” for the special occasion.  We certainly do not want to upstage the bride, but we must make sure we look our absolute BEST and that we’re dressed to the nines (…after all, bride’s already got her man – “psshh, wench! She looks just like a dad-gum Barbie doll up there”....I mean, CONGRATULATIONS!)  You never know what handsome, single groomsmen might be there??  We must present ourselves as the classy, kempt, glamorous women we really are.  (Nevermind the fact that last night we were eating chocolate-chip cookie dough ice cream in sweats while bawling over The Notebook…for the fiftieth time – hey! Don’t judge.)  Although, let’s get real…that handsome groomsman thing?  Never turns out.  The good-looking ones are usually spoken-for, and the others?...well let’s just say keg stands in the parking lot were not attractive when you were in college, and now that you’re 30? They’re still not. And while the bow-tie around your forehead is certainly useful for catching sweat as you do the worm across the dancefloor, it’s not so helpful in nabbing your future wife.  And, to the creeper in the corner who just stares and winks – is that a twitch?  Please tell me it is, because if that’s your version of a pick-up-line, it’s NOT working.  And Mr. rowdy, frat-star guy who is super fun to dance with – Though you wouldn’t know it, I do – in fact - have eyes…just look a few inches higher! Thank you.  Occasionally there’s a good one amongst the crowd, though.  And I certainly have several friends who can attest to that.  I also have many guy friends who have had to do their fair share of fending off those single ladies who may or may not keep it so classy…this really works both ways.

Fortunately though, despite the singles-scene (or lack thereof), weddings are always a time to celebrate with good friends, good food, and good times.  Being able to enjoy the time with people you care about and share an immeasurably special experience with two people who are dear to you is priceless in and of itself.  So, to all the single ladies out there – keep on, keepin’ on.  One day, you’ll be the Barbie doll standing at the altar…just do me a favor and invite some cute, sweet, gentlemen who will be able to say my name without slurring by the end of the night. 

(This post was more of a sarcastic take on weddings for those of us single folks out there, but I was actually able to attend a beautiful wedding held by my gorgeous friend Morgan and her lovely husband John Hawk in Hilton Head Island, SC last weekend.  I’m so very excited for the both of you, and could not have been more honored to be a part of such an amazing event.  I was able to see several of my best friends from college, and enjoy a wonderful celebration.  Please enjoy some pictures from the wedding! Congrats Morgan & John, and many blessings to you!…)

Moonshine!

I need some taller friends

First dance

Gang's all here!

No words...good times!